As I was discussing a few blogs ago this year may have been the best year of my life. Aside from the secondary school years and the sometimes happy sixth form years, the multiple hare brained adventures of university and my brief spell in Scarborough in 2009 where I met my first ever love; this year has been the one.
Monday, December 31, 2012
Sunday, December 30, 2012
While I was meant to be working...
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| Rocking the 3D Glasses look. So in right now *cool beans* |
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| Just popped to Toys R Us to give teddy a hug :) |
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| He's look far cuter than I ever could with a massive teddy bear! |
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| Amazing discount in the Christmas sales.. |
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| This is my delish brownie for the bf being cooked :) |
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| This is it's supreme amazingness! |
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| Giant hand? Small bottle? |
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| Amazing Christmas presents <3 Alongside a designer purse, Where's Wally pjs and a wine set (as well as a complete surprise treat. YUSH!) |
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| Me trying to get into the Christmas spirit :) |
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Monday, December 24, 2012
Let's celebrate Christmas with murder!
The way life is around here you'd really hope that by Christmas people may give each other a break. They might drop the arguments and the feuds. But god no. You can't open Facebook without getting an eyeful of so and so's falling out, and blahdy blahs black eyes. But perhaps the saddest thing about Christmas is the inevitable family dispute that leads to one murdered and one injured. That's the news from the village over from this town. Yet again, yet another Christmas and it dawns with someone dead.
Sunday, December 23, 2012
It's Christmas Eve Eve :)
So I wimped out on telling my parents about my boyfriend. So what? I've got a whole week to tell them before I spend midnight with him on New Years (very different being with someone local!). But the relationship is going very much 'FML' atm!
If I could write an autobiography someday I'm sure a lot of people will get a lot of laughs, and probably exchange sympathetic comments with me. But I'm sure we've all been in this position and you just have to look back and laugh.
If I could write an autobiography someday I'm sure a lot of people will get a lot of laughs, and probably exchange sympathetic comments with me. But I'm sure we've all been in this position and you just have to look back and laugh.
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
Back in the same place again...
So Friday (supposedly end of the world but we'll skate over that) I'm spending all afternoon (and early evening) Christmas shopping with the boyfriend, followed by a double date with his mates (eek) and stopping the night.
Trying to explain this to the mother-tron and come up with an excuse for my absence all day might possibly be neigh on impossible. Especially as I seem to be disappearing a lot lately to random people's houses. How can she not notice the pattern from the last boyfriend?!
So how do I tell her about him?
When do I tell her about him?
Should I just jump in there and say it?
Should I casually mention him?
Just why me :(
Didn't think I'd be in this position so soon after the last one :/
GAH!
Trying to explain this to the mother-tron and come up with an excuse for my absence all day might possibly be neigh on impossible. Especially as I seem to be disappearing a lot lately to random people's houses. How can she not notice the pattern from the last boyfriend?!
So how do I tell her about him?
When do I tell her about him?
Should I just jump in there and say it?
Should I casually mention him?
Just why me :(
Didn't think I'd be in this position so soon after the last one :/
GAH!
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
Happiness in Darkness
It's a shame that I write in this so infrequently these days even if it is but a random dip into my life as it is right now.
So what's happening.
I'm still with my boyfriend. My ex now has a girlfriend and I'm happy for him. He's probably a lot happier with her and she probably makes him smile a lot more than I could ever do so.
I'm still happy. I'm the happiest I've ever been for a long while.
I hate my course. Can't stand it. It's far too much paperwork and I'm rapidly coming to the conclusion that all teacher's are vindictive. I'd swap the teaching environment for a shelf stacking one no problemo. But I'm not a quitter, never have been. It shows weakness to let something get the better of you. So up on the tidal wave of pain I'm going to rise and I'm going to knock it flat. I'm going to be the best goddamn teacher you could ever imagine. And when the time comes I will look at this course and obliterate it from my memory. I will do something that makes me happy for once.
Yes, this is a major problem for me right now. I'm happy but I'm in a dictatorship. My parents are still omnipresent in my life. And as the times I stay out are getting longer and later their patience is wearing thin. I'm being bitched about behind my back, I'm getting the looks of disappointment and I'm getting the feeling that they want me long gone. And I want to be. Let me out of here. Let me into a household that welcomes me and I'm not ostracized That I'm not expected to go out with a certain type of man (cos lets face it my current one isn't want they want but I'm not happy with what they want, I've tried it) or expected to kill myself by trying to do a 101 things just to make them happy. No. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of it something terribly. I just need to get out, don't care who with. But when I leave this house, even temporarily it's like walking out of the steel bars and into a haven. It's a release.
However, I can't complain too much. This year may have been the best year of my life. So many changes, so many experiences, so many significant happenings. I've passed my driving test, I've lost people to death, I've lost friends and people I've spent a lot of time with, I've gone into things that are way above me, but I'm sat here smiling. I'm sat here smiling cos life couldn't have taught me a greater a lesson day by day if I hadn't gone through it all. I was ditched on a train platform, I was picked up in a pub. I left depression and entered exhilaration. I've had the love of my friend throughout it all, even if I don't get it at home. I've gone through stress in my course and complications and come through it all fighting. And I'm still having a bloody good time with it.
In a bitter sweet way, I've never been happier. Life can throw it's worst at me, I'll keep batting it away.
So what's happening.
I'm still with my boyfriend. My ex now has a girlfriend and I'm happy for him. He's probably a lot happier with her and she probably makes him smile a lot more than I could ever do so.
I'm still happy. I'm the happiest I've ever been for a long while.
I hate my course. Can't stand it. It's far too much paperwork and I'm rapidly coming to the conclusion that all teacher's are vindictive. I'd swap the teaching environment for a shelf stacking one no problemo. But I'm not a quitter, never have been. It shows weakness to let something get the better of you. So up on the tidal wave of pain I'm going to rise and I'm going to knock it flat. I'm going to be the best goddamn teacher you could ever imagine. And when the time comes I will look at this course and obliterate it from my memory. I will do something that makes me happy for once.
Yes, this is a major problem for me right now. I'm happy but I'm in a dictatorship. My parents are still omnipresent in my life. And as the times I stay out are getting longer and later their patience is wearing thin. I'm being bitched about behind my back, I'm getting the looks of disappointment and I'm getting the feeling that they want me long gone. And I want to be. Let me out of here. Let me into a household that welcomes me and I'm not ostracized That I'm not expected to go out with a certain type of man (cos lets face it my current one isn't want they want but I'm not happy with what they want, I've tried it) or expected to kill myself by trying to do a 101 things just to make them happy. No. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of it something terribly. I just need to get out, don't care who with. But when I leave this house, even temporarily it's like walking out of the steel bars and into a haven. It's a release.
However, I can't complain too much. This year may have been the best year of my life. So many changes, so many experiences, so many significant happenings. I've passed my driving test, I've lost people to death, I've lost friends and people I've spent a lot of time with, I've gone into things that are way above me, but I'm sat here smiling. I'm sat here smiling cos life couldn't have taught me a greater a lesson day by day if I hadn't gone through it all. I was ditched on a train platform, I was picked up in a pub. I left depression and entered exhilaration. I've had the love of my friend throughout it all, even if I don't get it at home. I've gone through stress in my course and complications and come through it all fighting. And I'm still having a bloody good time with it.
In a bitter sweet way, I've never been happier. Life can throw it's worst at me, I'll keep batting it away.
Thursday, December 6, 2012
The Pendulum
As my last blog briefly and succinctly put it. I am in a new relationship.
This girl moves fast apparently.
Having just started a new blog to comment on the woes of being single and the dating game, I had no idea that I'd fall so quickly into a new relationship. But what a whirlwind! Having met the guy in early August and my life completely changing from that very peninsula moment I didn't really expect to be sat here in a relationship with him.
So who is he?
I had known of him for many years, seen him about this old and boring town enough times to know that he likes his cars and he likes his work. I didn't even think that when I used to see him bumble in and out of the two pubs he worked in from his car to the bar quite literally that I'd ever really speak to him nevermind what has happened. He is definitely my type. It appears I have a penchant for barmen, and particularly bar men in a managerial position. So when I started going to his quiz and he randomly said 'don't do that, it's distracting' about me bouncing on my chair, something clicked. And out opened a wave of new life for me. Something woke up and stirred in my tummy. Something I hadn't felt in a long long time. Soon I was propping up the bar, leaning across it, leaving elbow marks in the marble surface so to speak, and burning a hole in my pocket as the pub became my new home. Only when I'm interested in men and chasing them do I spend so much time in a pub and drinking, my liver must pray for the time I'm so lonely.
So it wasn't until the Olympic Closing Ceremony that in actual facts things really got started with me and him. Soon chatting wasn't good enough anymore, I wanted him. And I wanted him for about a month or so afterwards to the point that he stopped going on date after date with other women, that he stopped going out on nights out, and suddenly he was there. And I was there for when he lost his job when the pub went into insolvency. And dates where he spent his time on his phone extended to dates where he paid attention to me. Without realising it I was on one of these such dates when he suddenly confirmed it, we'd passed from seeing each other to being with each other. My efforts of the last month and a bit had won. I had won him over.
Almost a month into things I'm just as happy as I was the day I met him and even happier now that he's stopped his flirting and stopped his gallavanting with other females.
I am actually content for once :) The pendulum has swung.
This girl moves fast apparently.
Having just started a new blog to comment on the woes of being single and the dating game, I had no idea that I'd fall so quickly into a new relationship. But what a whirlwind! Having met the guy in early August and my life completely changing from that very peninsula moment I didn't really expect to be sat here in a relationship with him.
So who is he?
I had known of him for many years, seen him about this old and boring town enough times to know that he likes his cars and he likes his work. I didn't even think that when I used to see him bumble in and out of the two pubs he worked in from his car to the bar quite literally that I'd ever really speak to him nevermind what has happened. He is definitely my type. It appears I have a penchant for barmen, and particularly bar men in a managerial position. So when I started going to his quiz and he randomly said 'don't do that, it's distracting' about me bouncing on my chair, something clicked. And out opened a wave of new life for me. Something woke up and stirred in my tummy. Something I hadn't felt in a long long time. Soon I was propping up the bar, leaning across it, leaving elbow marks in the marble surface so to speak, and burning a hole in my pocket as the pub became my new home. Only when I'm interested in men and chasing them do I spend so much time in a pub and drinking, my liver must pray for the time I'm so lonely.
So it wasn't until the Olympic Closing Ceremony that in actual facts things really got started with me and him. Soon chatting wasn't good enough anymore, I wanted him. And I wanted him for about a month or so afterwards to the point that he stopped going on date after date with other women, that he stopped going out on nights out, and suddenly he was there. And I was there for when he lost his job when the pub went into insolvency. And dates where he spent his time on his phone extended to dates where he paid attention to me. Without realising it I was on one of these such dates when he suddenly confirmed it, we'd passed from seeing each other to being with each other. My efforts of the last month and a bit had won. I had won him over.
Almost a month into things I'm just as happy as I was the day I met him and even happier now that he's stopped his flirting and stopped his gallavanting with other females.
I am actually content for once :) The pendulum has swung.
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