Trying To Break The Mould.

Lately I've had the mini epiphany that I'm stuck in this rut.  A mould that encompasses every aspect in my life (perhaps with the exception of my employment).

I only really wear black.  I can't wear anything else.  Wearing anything else makes me feel uncomfortable.  When I stray from the usual I end up regretting it the moment I've worn it.
I read the same books over and over again.  I know them by heart.
I watch the same films over and over again.
I will only read the genres I know, and walk the walks I've always walked.
I want to be home and showered by a certain time.
I will only have showers despite having the option of a bath.
I will carry on watching a TV series because I've already watched an hour or two.
I visit the same websites because I can't think of anything new.
I create the same people, with the same star signs and the same aspirations in the same houses on The Sims.
I am quite literally a creature of habit.

But I despise that.  I prefer living life on the edge, to be different and not the life of least resistance.

I'm already attempting that by trying to find my forte, that sadly, with so much work these days, has been put on the back burner.  I'm trying to wear brighter clothes, do my hair differently, and become more zesty.  But it's hard when you've done what you've done for many many years.  It's one of the reason why I have so many jobs.  One day I said to myself 'stop leading a boring life, go out there, do stuff, meet new people, have stories to tell'.  And I went out there and I did it.  I got as many varying jobs that was going, I became an opportunist.  Now when someone says to me 'tell me something interesting about yourself, tell me a story' I can normally muster something of some relevance related to work.  But this is an exception to the rest of my life which is rather dull and boring.  Sometimes I reflect back to my summer of 2009 and think...why has my life taken a down turn towards the mundane.  Yet, it's highly conceivable that that was my life prior to it.  A life of books and papers, of mindless TV and games.  Of sitting online every free minute and wasting my life.  Having had the taste of excitement though, it tends to breed ill contempt and makes you strive to achieve what you had before.

Again I strike the wall of how to change.  Should I change?  I want to.  But have no footing in going about it.  Instead of spending hours a day roaming the internet (which despite its vast size, the content I regularly peruse is restricted to a handful of sites) which usually means just sitting and waiting for a notification, I have already elected for picking up a book as an alternative.
I'm trying with the fashion and I'm trying with the games.  But it's hard when you're used to familiarity as a comfort.

What I need to do, is get out more...