The clocks have gone forward, and light nights and feelings of summer have come flooding in.
Yesterday may have been the best day of my life so far, including since I graduated :)
Early start, a wander around Durham's streets, 2 hours of Starbucks and practicing sums and peeking my nose in on shops.
A train to Newcastle, my first McD's of the day.
A half hour sit outside a Cathedral, listening to the chimes counting down to entering the test centre like a death toll.
Walking in and feeling so so nervous.
Walking out with a smile on my face.
A wander to the train station, jump on board and at the Metro Centre. Beating my bf at Air Hockey, losing the puck in the dodgems. Playing arcade games, running hand in hand around the mall, shopping.
Heading to Newcastle again, changing in the car park, walking down the street.
JOSH WIDDICOMBE and SEANN WALSH walking behind us. Boyfriend launching himself at him, directing them to the nearest Nando's.
A happy happy boyfriend. Grabs my hand, tells me that it's the best week of his life, that he's in love with me...
And that's where it made my day, best day of my life.
:)
He finally said it :).
And the show with Josh and Seann was amazing too :) LOL comedy genius.
Can someone wind back time please?
Showing posts with label Love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Love. Show all posts
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
Sunday, March 17, 2013
You wake up, shake a leg, go to the loo, brush your teeth, drag a comb through your hair, slap make up on your face, shrug out of your pjs and into new clothes, grab some breakfast, run out of the door, travel, travel travel, walk, walk, walk, sit in mind numbing lessons, and again, and again, and you're walking and you're walking and you're travelling, and you're home again, shrug off the clothes and into lounging clothes, scrape your hair up, start working, working, working, typing, typing, grabbing food, working and typing, showering and sleeping.
Saturday, January 26, 2013
"I'm falling for you too"
Imagine this scene...
The snow is coming down non-stop. The centimetres are growing, and your wellies are sunk to their kneecaps. The sky is white, the land is white, the children are white. They're sledging down the hill with smiles plastered on their face because they have the day off.
And I get a text.
"Oh I have something to tell you"
"What?!"
"Tell you when I see you"
The snow is coming down non-stop. The centimetres are growing, and your wellies are sunk to their kneecaps. The sky is white, the land is white, the children are white. They're sledging down the hill with smiles plastered on their face because they have the day off.
And I get a text.
"Oh I have something to tell you"
"What?!"
"Tell you when I see you"
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Newly Single
Since I've been single for just under two months now I thought I need a bit of happiness in my life (since that's the reason the relationship ended in the first place this is perhaps a great place to start). So I thought I'd write about the stupidity of being single on this blog for my own amusement in the hope that other people will also read this and empathise with me. I mean I can't be the only person out there who is ready to pull their hair out at the same sex, opposite sex, love, sex and all the uselessness that surrounds it all.
All names will for obvious reasons be removed from this.
So how did it end?
The last relationship died because of me. The apoplectic mess that was the latter half of my summer caused me to be permanently in a state of depression, resentment, and unfeeling. I was shriveled up inside, begging for laughter, begging for the good times. Instead I ensnared in a bottomless pit of anxiety and darkness. And so I made the dreadful decision to ask for a break from the relationship. Yes, like the song 'We are never getting back together' I asked for space after we'd already spent weeks apart. I may sound ungrateful, I may sound like the biggest bitch in the whole wide universe. But I needed to cut ties with people for a while. I needed to find my giggly self who never saw sense in the world. Who never took anything seriously and who never raised her voice to anyone.
And because of the monster I'd become, I was dumped on the platform in Essex watching him walk away and never looking back and leaving me to find my way back to London King's Cross with tears brimming in my eyes and totally unable to handle my bags all of a sudden. I got my suitcase trapped in the bloody ticket barrier - it screamed at me constantly. A man had to come help by placing his muddy dusty foot on my black new suitcase to kick it out of the system. I stood on the platform of the tube and watched them drive by one after the other wondering which one would take me to the station. In the end I hopped on board and hoped for the best.
That was to be the beginning of my single life.
All names will for obvious reasons be removed from this.
So how did it end?
The last relationship died because of me. The apoplectic mess that was the latter half of my summer caused me to be permanently in a state of depression, resentment, and unfeeling. I was shriveled up inside, begging for laughter, begging for the good times. Instead I ensnared in a bottomless pit of anxiety and darkness. And so I made the dreadful decision to ask for a break from the relationship. Yes, like the song 'We are never getting back together' I asked for space after we'd already spent weeks apart. I may sound ungrateful, I may sound like the biggest bitch in the whole wide universe. But I needed to cut ties with people for a while. I needed to find my giggly self who never saw sense in the world. Who never took anything seriously and who never raised her voice to anyone.
And because of the monster I'd become, I was dumped on the platform in Essex watching him walk away and never looking back and leaving me to find my way back to London King's Cross with tears brimming in my eyes and totally unable to handle my bags all of a sudden. I got my suitcase trapped in the bloody ticket barrier - it screamed at me constantly. A man had to come help by placing his muddy dusty foot on my black new suitcase to kick it out of the system. I stood on the platform of the tube and watched them drive by one after the other wondering which one would take me to the station. In the end I hopped on board and hoped for the best.
That was to be the beginning of my single life.
Stuck
I'm stuck in the middle of no-man's land.
Stuck in the middle of some proverbial crossroads.
Stuck in the middle of two warring countries.
Stuck between happiness and not knowing.
Life is progressively getting more like a soap opera than I could ever imagine it would be.
My hearts flying above a road and it's lingering. It's swaying towards the unknown and yet the happiness, the contentment but the non-trusting. It's an area of grey that swings like a pendulum.
Then it's swaying to what I know, to the end where the light is always shining at the end of the tunnel. It's a journey that's forever in the making but forever set in the concrete. It doesn't matter what time I take that turn, that turn will always be there.
Then it's swaying to the past. The past that I came from, and the past that I didn't think would end in the present.
It doesn't know what it wants. The mind is raging some war. The emotions are braving some frantic sea. I'm like a jelly figurine grasping on to hope in the darkness.
Someone throw me a rope.
Stuck in the middle of some proverbial crossroads.
Stuck in the middle of two warring countries.
Stuck between happiness and not knowing.
Life is progressively getting more like a soap opera than I could ever imagine it would be.
My hearts flying above a road and it's lingering. It's swaying towards the unknown and yet the happiness, the contentment but the non-trusting. It's an area of grey that swings like a pendulum.
Then it's swaying to what I know, to the end where the light is always shining at the end of the tunnel. It's a journey that's forever in the making but forever set in the concrete. It doesn't matter what time I take that turn, that turn will always be there.
Then it's swaying to the past. The past that I came from, and the past that I didn't think would end in the present.
It doesn't know what it wants. The mind is raging some war. The emotions are braving some frantic sea. I'm like a jelly figurine grasping on to hope in the darkness.
Someone throw me a rope.
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